Changes

I remember as a kid, I swore I would never wear baggy jeans. Simply put; it looked stupid. Stupid that is, until I realized all my friends at school were wearing them. At a different stage in my life, I swore I would never listen to rap, because it “sucked.” Until one day I actually listened to it (country however, still sucks). I also swore I would never wear medium tee-shirts because, surprise, they looked stupid. But once I re-realized baggy jeans were stupid, I noticed that medium tees are in fact cool.

Living in Japan is full of similar problems; sets of cultural "obstacles" to be avoided. We see what happened to foreigners who have lived here for a while. They speak funny. They point to their face when referring to themselves. Sometimes, they even suck their teeth when they are thinking hard. We don't want to become like that.

As new people, we wonder, "How much of the culture will we accept? Will we become weird like these other foreigners? Will we be unable to readjust to home when the time comes?"

People who are the most worried end up hating living here and detest everything about Japanese culture. For the rest of us, we slowly but surely sink into it without even noticing. This by no means says we actually "become Japanese," oh definitely not. To truly understand Japanese culture you must be born in Japan, to Japanese parents. There is no other way.

It must be due to some kind of national peer pressure; we find ourselves doing things we never thought we would. For example, cell phone ornaments (danglies, if you will) are ever popular here. If I can remember properly, they are highly unpopular at home (at least around most of my friends). So unpopular in fact, that after I moved here, I held pure contempt for foreigners who walked around brandishing ornaments on their phone. I looked away from my friends who bought them. I scoffed at stores for selling them. I wanted to have nothing to do with it.

Yet eleven months and a birthday present later, I realized I had become more accepting of the idea.


Mushroom power!!! What, no one is with me? It’s Luigi! Luigi, dammit!!

And that's not the worst of it. Let's get to the hard evidence and let the jury decide. Ladies and Gentlemen, I present you THIS:


But everyone was doing it!

Really though, everyone was doing it. Kyoto’s Gion Matsuri is one of the largest festivals in Japan. I'm actually surprised it doesn't have an official ranking, I can only assume the country hasn’t put together a committee for that yet. But the festival is quite large, and quite famous. And just about everyone dresses up. Just about everyone Japanese that is, but sometimes foreigners do, too.

The foreigners that dress up are actually the ones I have the most contempt for. They are so proud of their adopted culture and try to flaunt it to Japanese people. During the month long festival, I've seen the men dressed in yukata (summer kimono… think "dress") at the bar and try to chat up random girls. Then there are the ones who walk around in geta (wooden shoes) and gather crowds of ogling Japanese around them.

While I wasn't aiming to impress anyone, I was dressed nonetheless and apparently quite a sight. The girls in our group were in yukata and the boys, jumbei. For you curious readers, jumbei are quite comfy; like a pair of PJ's. And there is no better way to stroll around Kyoto than in pajamas.

But the things I have adjusted to don't end there, I'm sure of it. It actually gets a bit difficult to discern what I have picked up from being here, and what was always a part of me. It's strange, as I type, I find myself wanting to throw apostrophes where they don't belong. Why does "thank's" and "wan't" look right? Why do I consistently doubt the spelling of words with "L" and "R?" I know my student's textbook isn't going to say "Junior High School Engrish" on the cover, but I keep looking. Ever since my kids have shown me they can't tell the difference between "b" and "d," I keep wondering who is on the dasedall team and who owns a pet bog.

Even the way we speak has been altered. "Maybe" is used commonly in Japanese; for politeness people don't give definite answers. However in English (as far as I'm concerned), speaking like that comes across rude, even sarcastic.

"Can I go home early today?"

"Ehhh, sorry I forgot to mention, maybe you need to help with my lesson plan for tomorrow."

How about:

"Can I take vacation next Friday?"

"Maybe it's OK."

The problem with hearing this indirect politeness is that we foreigners end up adopting it. I don't even notice half the things that used to bother me, and I wonder how many more things I will adjust to in the future.

I will admit though, I still get frustrated when I'm not simply asked (or told) what to do. During class, for example, the teacher merely encourages me to do my job, with a lengthy, "We hope... that you would... review these words for everyone... and practice the pronunciation... so that they can become better at English."

I always want to answer, "Ohhh, am I being invited? Well, let me check my schedule for the next two minutes and get back to you."

Hmm… maybe it is something I will say next time.